Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Blind Panic - for The Gallery
As anyone who reads this blog knows, the two Italian children in the header are mine (from my marriage to their dad, an Italian) while the Canadian in the header is my Canadian husband who has no children - and last night when Leo, my youngest, came home from rugby looking like this it was so clear who the parent was - Robert, cool as a cucmber (he is anyway) and me , well, not. Once Leo was cleaned up (when Robert had first picked him up he looked even worse - like this but caked in mud too), we had eaten, had the glass of wine and generally got back to normal I felt sick - I had done the 'ok let's sort this out' bit' and I knew he was ok (it really is just aesthetic) - but for the first time in 10 years I heard myself say to Robert 'you haven't got children so you can't understand what it's like' - was that a wrong thing to say? I don't know - but I know that the moment of blind panic I had when I first saw Leo like this and while I was cleaning him up was something a parent knows - I am amazingly lucky, I have only had that blind panic a couple of times (once when Thomas cracked his head open aged 2 and the again when Thomas was 6 and got lost on a crowded beach) - having kids is great - but boy do I hate that blind panic moment when you think they are in danger - it is a feeling I have only had where my children are involved - so was I wrong to say that to Robert?